| |
By: Derek Price
|
If
you ever need proof that money doesn't buy
happiness, look to the Middle East.
Fifty years ago, this region was little more than sand
and camels punctuated by a few ramshackle tents that
housed people who hadn't changed their standard of
living in 1,000 years.
Today, though, much of the Middle East is swimming in
cash, which gets pumped in as fast as oil gets
pumped out. They have the world's tallest building
going up in Dubai, princes flying around in golden
airplanes in Saudi Arabia, and more high-end luxury
cars in Kuwait than in Beverly Hills. It's
ridiculous.
If you look at just one construction project -- the
"We've Got More Money Than Allah" Tower in Dubai --
it's clear that the area is suffering from an
inferiority complex. They don't just want it to be
the tallest building in the world. They want it to
be 40 percent taller than any building in the
history of humanity, complete with a $1 billion
price tag.
Now don't get me wrong. Competition is great most of
the time. But when it goes overboard, you end up
paying so much attention to building your fancy
skyscraper that you forget about the threat of being
vaporized by a radical freak who wears a tablecloth
on his head. To make matters worse, your neighbors
still end up living in third-century huts being
breathed on by camels.
Which, of course, brings me to the new Lexus LS 460.
When you're within the sinfully luxurious confines of
this car -- Lexus' top-of-the-line model -- you'll
notice how comfortable it tries to make you feel.
There's a power sunshade that motors up and down at
the touch of a button, seats that are heated and
cooled, a navigation system that talks in a soothing
voice, and enough sound insulation to keep it
perfectly silent when Hamas blows up the synagogue
next door.
The only problem? Lexus is trying a bit too hard.
The LS has long competed with the Mercedes-Benz
S-Class, a luxury heavyweight that seems more German
than sauerkraut, to win the hearts and wallets of
gazillionaires across the globe. Both cars are
ridiculously quiet, smooth and comfortable, and both
are expensive. The Mercedes starts at $85,400, while
the Lexus rings up at a more affordable $61,000.
In some ways, the LS is the better car. It's slightly
quieter, and many people think it looks better than
the S-Class, which undergoes styling changes on a
geologic time scale.
But you also can't help but wonder how much better this
car could have been if Lexus wasn't constantly
trying to one-up the German competition.
For example, the S-Class came out with a seven-speed
automatic transmission recently, which is at least
one gear too many. It hunts and pecks for the right
ratio like a 5-year-old on a typewriter, never quite
settling on the perfect gear. Not wanting to be
outdone, Lexus fitted the new LS with an eight-speed
tranny, which makes it even more indecisive than the
Mercedes.
It's a shame, really. Lexus' team of incredibly
talented and well-educated engineers wasted their
time trying to cram another gear into an already
overworked transmission rather than tackling the
LS's real problem, which is its utter and complete
lack of a soul.
This car does everything a luxury vehicle should. It
coddles you on long highway trips, letting you
travel with the serenity of an angel fluttering
across the universe. It looks fantastic, drawing
attention and giving you a dose of devilish pride.
And it's packed with so much technology that the
role of the driver is almost inconsequential. Heck,
if you can afford the options list, it'll even
parallel-park itself.
But it feels like an appliance. While a great car --
that is, one that has a soul -- becomes a partner
and a family member when you take the wheel, the
Lexus is a simple transportation tool engineered to
accomplish a task.
That's why I think the new LS, like Dubai, isn't great.
It's merely a car that does great things.
And that's totally different. |
| |
|
 |
| Ratings: |
|
Style: 8
Performance: 7
Price: 8
Handling: 6
Ride: 9
Comfort: 10
Quality: 10
Overall: 9
|
| Why Buy
It: |
|
It's one of the world's best luxury cars, and it
costs thousands less than its German competition.
|
| Why Avoid
It: |
|
It feels as lively as concrete.
|
|
| |
